So...it seems that Satan has taken it upon himself to attack me in every way he can in the last few months. As a result, my search for balance went by the wayside. For instance, today Dustin and I were talking about how I don't do things that bring me joy if I have responsibilities to attend to or things to worry about. I have a lot of reasons for behaving that way that are rooted in the past, but that doesn't make it right.
I was so excited about the future, and when it started coming at me faster than I realized, I panicked. I let Satan get a foot-hold through fear...one of his greatest tools in my life. I feared I wouldn't be able to keep up with work, school, and pregnancy (and truth be told, I've had to take some time off of work). I feared we wouldn't have enough money. I feared I wouldn't be a good mom. The point is, I feared.
Once again, I let Satan tell me that being me simply isn't good enough. Why did he have that chance? Why did I listen for so long? Because I took my eyes off of Jesus. Just like Peter, I feared the storm instead of trusting in the One who could calm the wind, the waves, and my heart. Once again, I've learned my lesson. I'm looking back to my LORD who has incredible plans for my life.
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